Tips for Making your First Date Lead to a Second Date

Written by Editor on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

 I go out on many first dates and often get turned down for another. I wish my dates would at least give me a second chance. Am I doing something wrong? I know first impressions are important, but are they the only thing that matters? What can I do to improve my overall chances of at least landing a second date?

Penny Short and Pound Foolish

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

I often find myself scrambling for ideas of where to take a girl out on a date, mostly since finances are tight but I want a girl to feel special and appreciated. My finances also impact my ability to travel for dating, to afford dating websites, dating events, and how I dress on a date. Perhaps most importantly, I’m self-conscious about how I’m perceived by the girl I’m dating and my confidence in being able to provide for a wife and family someday suffers. What can I do to maximize my dating success with limited finances?

When It Comes to Dating, Is It All ‘Location, Location, Location’?

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

I often hear from friends, family, and well-meaning neighbors that I should consider moving to a larger dating scene, such as Israel or New York. They believe that my opportunities for finding a match would be greater there. I have a great job, family, a support system, and a community I love where I’m currently living. Is the grass really that much greener on the other side? Am I selling myself short by not moving?

10 Tips to Making Dating Events Work for You

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

I recall the overwhelming feeling of walking into yet another singles event. Here we go again! The nerves, the anticipation: Who will be there? How do I look? Will this just be another one of those events where I put myself out there and once again leave empty-handed?

The Heartbreak of Dating with a Disability in the Jewish World

Written by Ariella Barker on . Posted in Dating

Eleven years ago, I appeared in front of the Rabbinical Council of America to gain their permission to officially convert to Judaism. The Rabbi asked me one pointed, unforgettable question: “As a goy, you are able to marry most anyone in the world. Why would you convert and limit yourself to less than 2 percent of the population?” For me, the answer was simple. I only wished to marry a Jewish man and to raise my children with Jewish values. If I remained a goy, I would be unable to marry anyone. Alas, over a decade later, I am still unmarried.

What About You?

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

A little selfishness is a good thing, even in a relationship.

I grew up in a home where giving was loving. When I began dating I began giving, sometimes a bit too much; it would go either unappreciated or unreciprocated, and I’d start to become resentful. How can I learn to give in a comfortable and healthy way without compromising who I am and what I need in a relationship?

A 'Hands-Off' Approach to Dating

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

 Although I did not grow up a religious Jew, I became more religiously observant over time and have been practicing shomer negiah (not touching the opposite gender until marriage) as an adult. I have been dating a man for eight months, and it’s going well, but I broke shomer negiah with him a few months ago. I feel badly, but think we have a stronger relationship because of it.

Breaking Free From Emotional Enslavement

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

Amidst the hustle and bustle of pre-Pesach preparations, we find ourselves preoccupied with cleaning, shopping, and cooking. It’s that time of year again, when we think of slavery, freedom, four cups of wine, miracles, and — of course — that long-awaited fresh springtime air!

Unmasking the Hidden Gem

Written by Rachel Burham on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

 Am I the only one who feels like there is nobody to date? I am a 29-year-old single; I have dated the people potentially suitable for me in my area (and several beyond!) and none of those relationships worked out. I do get additional suggestions, but they are mostly out of left field and are not what I am looking for. Does my bashert (soulmate) even exist? Any suggestions on how to move forward? I feel like I’ve hit a brick wall.

Five Ways to Attract the Relationship You Want but Can’t Find

Written by Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

A Reader Asks:

When I describe the qualities I’m looking for in a spouse to a friend, matchmaker, or family member, I detail goals and values, what I respect and appreciate in a date, and aspects of my personality. Frustratingly, I’m repeatedly disappointed at the options that come my way. Is it me? Am I not being clear? Does that person not exist? How do I change this pattern of bad or wrong dates?

Flawed Assumptions

Written by By Rachel Burnham on . Posted in Dating

Dating coach Rachel Burnham answers your questions.

A Reader Asks:

I repeatedly find myself at this point in dating when I’m really liking the person, but now know them well enough to see their flaws as well. I’m not talking about superficial nitpicky issues or major red flags, but the sort of mid-level quirks that you know will grate on you horribly 20 years from now. It gives me an overwhelming urge to bail. My friends say I shouldn’t be letting debatable flaws influence my decision to continue a relationship, but I worry I’d be ignoring my instincts.